Today, I want to call us to a sense of peace in who we are and where we are in our journey. By that, I certainly do not mean that we are to become complacent. I mean that we decide to find contentment in the lives that we have chosen and to be joyful in our own journey.
The current environment of social media and constant news has become a curse to many of us. While we entered the realm of social media for the purpose of collaboration and connection, it has quickly become a mire of false impressions and negative self talk. We look at the feed before us and find all of the “good” in others while realizing the “bad” in ourselves or our lives. We just don’t match up with all of the perfect moms there on our screen. We have invited the devil right into our subconscious and we didn’t even realize he was knocking.
The saddest thing is that we have built this life that we are living, many of us intentionally, for a grand and wonderful purpose—to grow and nurture our growing families. We have intentionally chose less so that we can live a life of joy and peace. But if we are not secure in our decisions, if we are not resolute in our end goals, it is very easy for us to think of our intentions as being invaluable in comparison.
Comparison. That is the single most damaging thing we do to ourselves when we are feeding on the media’s portrayal of false reality. What exactly are we comparing when we scroll our IG or FB feeds? We see someone’s very best in a single snapshot of one particular corner of their homes or lives and we use that to rate our very worst moments in our otherwise wondrous day. They, for one moment, got all of their kids to smile and stop hitting each other so they could get the perfect shot of their matching clothes. You compare that to the fact that your kids are having a pillow fight in their pj’s at 3:30 pm. They finally got their kitchen counters cleaned off after trying for two days, so they shared the bareness of it all. You compare that to the dirty stove that you have used to cook the last forty eight meals on because you are determined to stick to your budget and eat out less.
See? You have your priority list and you are working on those things to become better each and every day. They are doing the same. But the lists are never going to be the same for two separate people, living separate lives, in separate towns—it isn’t going to happen. And that is okay! We don’t have to have the same priorities to be on the same team. We just have to have a realistic sense of who we are and where we are going coupled with a huge desire to cheer others on along their journey.
Maybe we can treat social media like a marathon race. If you have ever participated in a long race, one of the best parts is the bystanders who get up early and choose a spot for the sole purpose of cheering on the participants. They aren’t running or walking (or crawling) to the finish line—but they are happy for those who are trying to get there. So, they cheer and clap and hand out donuts. It’s a wonderful snapshot of neighborly love and encouragement.
Social media can be the same—if that is what we make it! We can choose how we approach social media. We can choose to be a supportive without allowing ourselves to feel less than for the choices we have made to be homemakers and mommies. We can choose to cheer on our online friends and acquaintances while we choose to live out completely different goals in our lives.
So, I have a challenge for you—consider giving yourself a small break from social media, maybe a few weeks or a month. Allow yourself to have a vacation from all of the inputs, and while you are enjoying your vacation, write down your goals and purpose in the life you have chosen. Why do you do the things you do the way you do them? Are the current methods helping you reach your highest goals for yourself and your family? Who do you really want to be? What would you like to have (honestly) said about you at your funeral? Take some time to write down your priority list and goals for yourself, your family and your home.
Then, feel good about the decisions you’ve made. Feel sure in your ability to reach those goals. Feel secure that the priorities that you have listed are the right ones for you and your family and don’t ever again let anyone make you feel less than for choosing them.
And then, when your social media vacay is over, you can have a completely different perspective of the inputs that you see on your feed. You can be a supportive, encouraging voice to those who you follow WITHOUT the feeling of inferiority or competition. You can enjoy the joys and triumphs of others without feeling like you need to compare yourself with them. Because you’re on the same team now, you are playing the part of a cheering bystander without the need to insert their “reality” into yours.
Isn’t that freeing? If you can’t imagine taking a break from social media, let me challenge your thinking. If you are so attached that you feel like you can’t let it go, I promise you can and that you will be better for it. I took off one month from all social media and tv news to give myself a reset. I had more time to self reflect, to think of my priority list and my goals, individually and for my family and home. And, believe it or not, I found the courage and self confidence to start a YouTube channel and blog—something I have been telling myself for years I could never do.
See! It is possible to find yourself when you let go of all the inputs that make you doubt yourself. Please trust yourself enough to be enough. Find who you are and who you truly want to become, and set out TODAY to become that version of yourself.
We will be here to support you—to cheer you on! That is what this growing community is about. Encouraging one another to be the best versions of ourselves by becoming a little better every single day.
And we can do great things TOGETHER!
Please check out HOME MADE SIMPLE on YouTube, here where I have a video on this very topic.
If you’re interested in reading the book I mentioned by Dale Carnegie, you can find it here. I hope that it will be a blessing and encouragement to you to be kind to yourself as you build the home and family of your dreams!
Because life is hard, so we should make home simple!
I love you!!
Lori
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